Ask Paul: When is it time to sell the family home?

After 40 years in their much-loved home, rising costs, ageing and health issues are forcing this Melbourne couple to decide whether it's finally time to move on.

Reader question

Hi Paul,

For 40 years, my husband, 71, and I, 69, both retired for two years, have lived in our outer-east Melbourne 1950s weatherboard home on a steep half-acre block.

Over the years we have extended and updated parts of the house, although it still needs some TLC.

We tried selling it in 2023, yet the offers wouldn't cover a new property that didn't need renovations, so we had our house restumped, a roof renovation and a total paint job inside and out, paid for from our superannuation.

The property is still at the low end of the market in an area with a range of low-to-high values.

We looked into subdividing the property, but the cost to put in stormwater through four properties to the outlet as per the council, is too high.

My husband has chronic health issues and finds accessing the yard and even the shower over the bath difficult. We have $400,000 in superannuation and $50,000 in savings.

Should we sell the house and use part of the super to buy a better, turnkey home on a smaller, level block, which may cost more, or stay here and update the bathroom and kitchen?

We don't want to live in a unit, apartment or a retirement village.

I'm worried that we'll run out of super in the years to come, or that we'll expire before the super does. Feeling very torn! - Susan

Paul's response

I'm feeling out of my depth here, Susan. There are some powerful personal feelings about your house. I can tell you have loved it - and still do.

Reading your email, though, I get plenty of clues that the emotional attachment you seem to have is not practical. You tell me about your husband's chronic health issues and how accessing the yard and the shower over the bath is difficult.

The house is on a half-acre, steep block. I wonder how you will be able to maintain this land, let alone an older house.

This is up to a professional real estate agent, but you mention it is in the lower end of property prices, and it has the option to subdivide into four blocks, with costs such as stormwater drainage. I would think this would be attractive to developers.

I also worry that its real value is land value, meaning any extra money you put into it is wasted.

I can only read the words you have sent me, so you need to talk to some decent agents about your sale prospects. Values and saleability may have changed since 2023. My sense, based on broad experience over many decades, is that it may be time for you to move to a more appropriate property, given your husband's health.

I can understand that you do not want to live in a unit, apartment or retirement village; that is a personal choice. But what about a much smaller home on a small, flat block of land. Equally a townhouse might be just the thing for you.

My wife and I are pretty much the same age you are. So it is not just my professional experience with people looking to downsize, it is real life for us.

Many of our friends are going through exactly this, often driven by one partner's health issue. We also know our house will be too big for us in time to come.

Unless an agent tells you differently about spending more on your current home, I am nervous about spending money on more improvements.

But, more importantly, I am worried about you and your husband. You may be able to make the house more liveable today, but is an old house on a huge block right for you as the years go by? I suspect not.

The decision to move is a very big one. It is also emotionally and physically hard as you pack up memories.

I'll tell you from experience one thing that is for sure. You really should move before it becomes too hard due to your age and health. None of this is easy and I wish you both all the best.

What to read next

• How to downsize without losing your identity
• A practical guide to downsizer super contributions
• How to cash in on land values by subdividing
• A beginner's guide to bridging loans
• What a home renovation really costs

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